You know why Chuck Norris is always on top during sex? Because he never f*cks up
There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives
Chuck Norris doesn't lick the back of a stamp if he wants to send out the mail, he just looks at the stamps and they wet themselves
Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one
