Always give 100% at work: 12% Monday, 23% Tuesday, 40% Wednesday, 20% Thursday, 5% Friday
Dear alcohol, We had a deal where you would make me funnier, smarter, and a better dancer... I saw the video... we need to talk.
Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.
My favorite sexual position: The Chilean miner. That's where you go down on me and stay there till Christmas
