How are husbands like lawn mowers? They're hard to get started, they emit noxious odors, and half the time they don't work
Never argue with a woman when she's tired...or when she's rested.
I don't think it's rude to ask someone in an online dating site to send a picture posing with a copy of today's newspaper
Actually, I don't think you're dyslexic; just really, really stupid.