Some people only gets called by their nicknames. Usually it sounds weird to even say their real name
I tried to be polite and hold the door open for a woman, but she kept screaming, "I'm peeing in here!"
The poor wish to be rich, the rich wish to be happy, the single wish to be married, and the married wish to be dead
How many alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to hold the bulb, and one to drink until the room starts spinning.