What did the egg say to the boiling water? It will take a minute for me to get hard I just got laid by a chick
How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail? Rename the mail folder "Instruction Manuals."
What's the most popular pick up line in a gay bar? Can I push your stool in?
A relationship with no trust is like a phone with no service. And when you phone has no service, What do you do? You play games