Chuck Norris went skydiving and his parachute failed to open. So, he took it back the next day for a refund
Before going to bed, the Boogeyman always checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris gets bitten by a zombie, the zombie turns into Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris doesn't lick the back of a stamp if he wants to send out the mail, he just looks at the stamps and they wet themselves