I would like to fart in a bag and shove it over your head.
And the cry-baby-iets award goes to YOU. Enclosed with the shiny award is a step by step manual on how to man up and cease being mad.
He would complain that it is not fair that the stove has fire and he doesn't
I personally would not trust you to feed my goldfish while I'm away, you would only kill it and then blame someone else for it.