During sex, my girlfriend always wants to talk to me. Just the other night she called me from a hotel
Once we had Clinton, Johnny Cash and Bob Hope. Now we have Bush, no Cash and no Hope
A man enters a store and says: "15 litres of wine please." "Did you bring a container for this?" "You're speaking to it."
All those years of getting horrible elementary school pictures was just society's way of preparing you for your driver's license photo.