How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word? Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!
I need to start paying closer attention to stuff. Found out today my wife and I have separate names for the cat
Everything becomes 100 times louder when you're trying not to wake someone up
I flirted with disaster last night. Now disaster won't stop texting me.