I'll be Burger King and you be McDonald's. I'll have it my way, and you'll be lovin' it
Why are Fathers like parking spaces? The good ones are already taken!
How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word? Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!
I've been running as fast as I can, but I still can't catch my breath.