Where do you find a birthday present for a cat? In a cat-alogue!
What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying? The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time
Weddings and funerals are the same because I love going but I don't want them to be about me
