Why is air a lot like sex? Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any
When my friends are sad, i send them a long ass paragraph, but when I'm sad, they only say "Oh sorry" or "Well that sucks"
The speed of light is when you take out a bottle of beer out of the fridge before the light comes on
The deeper the pit you're falling into, the more chance you have to learn how to fly
