The Miss Universe pageant is fixed. All the winners are from Earth.
Dear alcohol, We had a deal where you would make me funnier, smarter, and a better dancer... I saw the video... we need to talk.
Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.
I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller", he said "Not you again"
