Top 10 Funny One Liners

Women are unable to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking because these men already have boyfriends.

I proposed. She said NO. I lived happily ever after.

If you got tired of living, don't share your thoughts with all your friends - they might not give you a chance to change your mind.

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

What's the difference between a slut and a bitch? A slut will have sex with anyone, a bitch will have sex with anyone but you

Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera? Just when it's getting interesting, they're finished until next time

Those who have some means think that the most important thing in the world is love; the poor know that it is money.

Why do men whistle when they're sitting on the toilet? Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe

Never break someone's heart because they have only one inside...break their bones because they have 206 of them

Darling, what are you thinking about right now? If I would want you to know, I would say it not think about it