Married With Children One Liners & Quotes

Al Bundy

Threats don't frighten me. I'm married!

This Al Bundy quote is rated: 2.79 from: 14 votes

Bed them, don't wed them. Do them, don't woo them, date them don't mate them

This Al Bundy quote is rated: 3.13 from: 45 votes

Hey, Marcy, what's holding the towel up?

This Al Bundy quote is rated: 2.95 from: 22 votes

Sure selling shoes is fun. But behind the glamour, it's like any other minimum wage slow death

This Al Bundy quote is rated: 3.18 from: 11 votes

I married you till death do us part. Which means when I'm dead I'm free to date

This Al Bundy quote is rated: 2 from: 16 votes

Insurance is like marriage. You pay and pay but you never get anything back

This Al Bundy quote is rated: 3.54 from: 13 votes

Six bucks is too much money to spend on any woman

This Al Bundy quote is rated: 2.63 from: 8 votes