Al Bundy One Liners & Quotes

Sure selling shoes is fun. But behind the glamour, it's like any other minimum wage slow death

I married you till death do us part. Which means when I'm dead I'm free to date

Insurance is like marriage. You pay and pay but you never get anything back

Six bucks is too much money to spend on any woman

A man's home is his coffin

Peg, did your mother get so fat she spread across the border?

I'm not paying for mistakes. I've been doing that since I got married.